Avoiding the Rack

2014 has been a year of bad news ranging from missing airplanes, racial issues, gender issues, and missing dictators (*cough Kim Jong-Un). We're really grasping for happy straws this year. Thus I wanted to start off my first post of 2014 on a happy note with, possibly quite literally, the happiest person of the year. Not only does Pharrell have his insanely popular Oscar nominated song but he also got a chance to sing alongside Daft Punk on their new album. Yeah, this guy is having a good year. Pharrell Williams may very well be one of Hollywood's most stylish men however, he's more well known for his incredible hat than his incredible style. Which is why he is this year's easiest costume choice. Put on your sharpest (track) suit and add a few dozen gold chains for flair and you just might be the bell of the ball. Of course, top it all off with Pharrell's signature hat and you have yourself the best dressed costume of the year. Who this costume is for...

The Syfy channel may be bordering on the lines of Sci-Fi these days with titles like Sharktopus and Dinocroc vs. Supergator (which are all perfectly adequate costumes by the way) but for some reason nothing can even come close to crossing the line between ridiculous and completely awesome quite like Sharknado .  For those who have never heard of this truly mind-blowing sensation here is the trailer to catch you up to speed: In terms of things taking the internet by storm, Sharknado was definitely one of my favorite things to witness blowing through our lives. The tweets surrounding it might have been just as enjoyable as watching Tara Reid escape this jaw-dropping epidemic or land sharks in tornado form. Which is why, in my deepest belief, a Sharknado costume would be more deserving of a high five than anything else we see come out of this year. Read those tornado costume tutorials online because this one is worth it! Who this costume is for: Fans of Sharktopus ...

I have to admit I'm pretty sick of hearing about the Royal Wedding, even after the fact. I know this event only happens every once in a blue moon, but there's just so much more interesting things in the world to report on rather than someone's boring wedding. However, what I'm not sick of hearing about though is gay marriage. So this is me recognizing that the royal wedding is a significant event that happened this year by fusing it with another marriage event of equal or possibly greater importance that also happened this year: the legalization of gay marriage. As a (fictional) gay man once said "Eat your heart out Kate Middleton!" The british monarchy may not give us a gay royal wedding for years to come but it doesn't mean that we can't kill two birds with one stone this halloween and class it up as Will & Nate or Kate & Jill. Maybe someday gay royals.... maybe someday. Speaking of the royal wedding, another great spinof...

Epic Meal Time is a YouTube cooking show which comes up with weekly meals that could feed an entire African village. For a year. Garnishing millions of views every week, the Epic Meal Time gang is known for their signature high-calorie, high-vulgar, and high-testosterone video clips. Eat your heart out Paula Dean. If you haven’t heard of Epic Meal Time, the team consists of a bunch of misfits who use their collective efforts to come up with recipes Martha Stewart would have nightmares about. By chicks, he means eggs. Every other episode mainly consists of something like this though: No joke. Given the nonchalant nature of the Epic Meal Time gang, a last-minute costume might go unnoticed during Halloween festivities. Here are some essentials you must have to truly establish yourself as a star of Epic Meal Time. What You’ll Need: A bottle of Jack Daniels (preferably a handle) Bacon (the more, the better) Bacon strips t-shirt Musc...

Never has the bleeding art of ballet been so scary and yet so glamourous than in Black Swan. This year has housed many a horror film, torture porn, and dance flick however nothing seems to stand out as much as this film. No one will recognize you as a character from Step Up 3D or even as the iconic roles from Bonnie & Clyde vs. Dracula   (yes this is real) as much as the infamous Black Swan. oh hello fabulous For those who don't know, Black Swan is a psychological tale of a young Natalie Portman's spiral into insanity over the lead role in Swan Lake. This self-inflicted mental obsession leads poor Natalie into such shenanigans as drugs, lesbian sex, fists fights with her mom, and eventually... knife fights with her pretend self. All the while she shows off that she is a really awesome dancer so all is forgiven. This movie not only got a lot of buzz (mostly for the girl-on-girl sex scene) but it was also able to do what most movies can't, Black Swan ...

Anonymous, an online civil activist group, has picked up the slack with our favorite borderline albino, Julian Assange (WikiLeaks), dancing away into oblivion. The world just can’t seem to catch a break. Financial troubles, natural disasters, and famine haven’t discriminated amongst the global population. This costume is perfect for anyone who’s discontent with the status quo, but has reservations about committing to a cause they know little about. No introduction needed. The best part of dressing as Anonymous is the ability to bring relevance to costumes/clothes from your earlier years. Hopped on the V for Vendetta bandwagon? Aspired to be Green Man from It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia? Looking for an occasion to wear an ill-fitting suit that was bought from you before puberty struck? Anonymous with a 4chan flair Don't be the voice of a silent generation but rather a loud voice in a faceless generation. S...

Jo Calderone provides the best opportunity for “dragception” there has ever been in years. How many people can say they’re a man dressed as a woman dressed as a man? Or even a woman dressed as a man that's actually a woman? It’s enough to make your head spin. So lovely. Lady Gaga is such a iconic modern pop figure that she makes for a brilliant costume every year and every season. Her most talked about outfit (or stage act) this year is none other than Mr. Calderone. Rather than running into the blonde glitzy pop star clone army this halloween, be a pop star in disguise and shine in the niche shadows of those who are in the know about Jo Calderone. Low key glamour is the way to go! This costume is for the ambitious hair-gel owner this halloween. Not only does it require at least a pound of styling products but flair, personality, and little quirks are a must for the role to really come to life. If you're already looking for a Lady Gaga costume, then this is t...