Avoiding the Rack

I don't want to seem like I'm obsessed with sharks or anything... but you guys should really see this shark. I have to admit, the Superbowl was quite grueling to watch as a Seattleite but the one highlight for me (and the rest of the internet) is Katy Perry's left dancer in the amazing shark suit (whom I am now in love with). Left Shark's dance moves may not be as on point as right shark but they have definitely stolen all the thunder from anything else that might have happened during sports ball. The left shark costume is the best excuse to dance as drunk and high as you like (most likely any day of the year). Alternatively, this can turn into a couples costume (or even a threesome Katy Perry sandwich). Who this costume is for: Anyone looking to mesh their keen interest in shark week with their significant other's Top 40 music taste Many of those who would like very much not to forget this Superbowl ever happened What you...

2014 has been a year of bad news ranging from missing airplanes, racial issues, gender issues, and missing dictators (*cough Kim Jong-Un). We're really grasping for happy straws this year. Thus I wanted to start off my first post of 2014 on a happy note with, possibly quite literally, the happiest person of the year. Not only does Pharrell have his insanely popular Oscar nominated song but he also got a chance to sing alongside Daft Punk on their new album. Yeah, this guy is having a good year. Pharrell Williams may very well be one of Hollywood's most stylish men however, he's more well known for his incredible hat than his incredible style. Which is why he is this year's easiest costume choice. Put on your sharpest (track) suit and add a few dozen gold chains for flair and you just might be the bell of the ball. Of course, top it all off with Pharrell's signature hat and you have yourself the best dressed costume of the year. Who this costume is for...

In lieu of the long awaited final season of the most underrated television series of all time, Arrested Development is now more relevant than ever! I can almost predict that no home-made costume will be more popular nor more well received and those lucky enough to recycle their old AD costumes can get away without spending a dime this year. Those looking to stay in luxe threads while partying all night can easily pull off a Lucile or Lindsey while gentlemen can stick to Michael or a very obscure personal favorite, Bob Loblaw. However, no character is more recognizable than Tobias as a blue man or never nude and Buster comes in a close second with his hook hand. If you have a very willing friend, you can convince them to dress as Buster's archenemy, the seal. If anyone owns a segway, it is almost mandatory to go as Gob this year since you will never find a better opportunity to look cool traveling on a segway while party hopping or trick or treating....

Political costumes can seem lame for those who just don't have a need or want to follow the circus that is American politics sometimes. However, what isn't lame is a Clint Eastwood costume aka the badass cowboy of Hollywood lore. Known for his notable roles in films such as Dirty Harry , The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly , Unforgiven , and A Fistful of Dollars ... just to name a few. The problem with this is that none of these movies are particularly relevant to 2012. However a chair will fix any Clint Eastwood costume this year! While Clint Eastwood shines in all the acting roles he's been in, thanks to his speech at the Republican National Convention, his claim to fame this year is now tied to this chair. Here is the speech in full so you can view it in all its glory (and see what all the fuss is about): It doesn't matter if you're dressing up as a cowboy, boxing coach, or a Hmong food loving cranky neighbor. Adding a chair to your costume will take ...

One of my favorite photos on the internet just came out this year and it's of these three women in this beautiful ocean scene being unfortunately photobombed by a stingray. I don't know what I like about this photo better, the Sting ray's expression or the expression of of horror on these women's faces at the possibility of being near the very creature that ended Steve Irwin's life. This costume needs no explanation. If you're looking for an easy last minute costume then look no further! Costumes don't get easier than this and you'll literally be the predator of the party when you unsuspectedly photobomb ALL the photos! Who this costume is for: Anyone who wants to hug some ladies all night Definitely for the photogenic (but also a good chance for the camera shy to come out of their shells) Stingray lovers everywhere! What you'll need: A point grey and slimy tail A triangular shaped body (with a cut out for your face) Shocking an...

Though it is unsure how history will look back on Mitt Romney's political campaign but right now history sees it as a visual-fest of memes. So many memes! While these memes may not last past the election, they're a good way to keep yourself classy this halloween by reusing maybe an old suit or prom tuxedo while carrying a binder full of women in case you don't end up with a date. Let's start with my favorite: Homeless Big Bird What a wonderful way to express the 1% kicking the 99% to the ground than with Mitt Romney and his nemesis Big Bird.  This meme stemmed from a comment that the governor made about halting subsidiaries to PBS in effort to cut spending and get the country out of its massive debt. However he called out Big Bird specifically in this quote: "I like PBS, I love Big Bird. Actually like you, too. But I'm not going to -- I'm not going to keep on spending money on things to borrow money from China to pay for." This sparked th...

I'm not saying you've been living in a hole if you've never heard of Gangnam style but it has been in  Time ,  ABC ,  CBC  , The Atlantic  and pretty much all of the internetz (don't ask why this is news). While this parody video may be the flavor of the week in terms of viral music videos, who doesn't want to be a prissy Korean horse rider for a day and show some real swag? Thus Gangnam style is joining my list of halloween costumes for 2012, to which is there is only one so far (gosh I really need to get moving on these).    It's almost humanly impossible to sit down and not watch this video more than once. T-Pain was the one to say it best when he tweeted "Words cannot even describe how amazing this video is." While I love this video to death, I think it's surprising to everyone that the only Korean song to make a mark outside of Korea is actually a song that makes fun of Korea. Gangnam is a small neighborhood in Seoul that is reno...

I have to admit I'm pretty sick of hearing about the Royal Wedding, even after the fact. I know this event only happens every once in a blue moon, but there's just so much more interesting things in the world to report on rather than someone's boring wedding. However, what I'm not sick of hearing about though is gay marriage. So this is me recognizing that the royal wedding is a significant event that happened this year by fusing it with another marriage event of equal or possibly greater importance that also happened this year: the legalization of gay marriage. As a (fictional) gay man once said "Eat your heart out Kate Middleton!" The british monarchy may not give us a gay royal wedding for years to come but it doesn't mean that we can't kill two birds with one stone this halloween and class it up as Will & Nate or Kate & Jill. Maybe someday gay royals.... maybe someday. Speaking of the royal wedding, another great spinof...

Fallen dictators are all the rage in the news this year. Reporters just simply jumped on them as if they were Perez Hilton when he first discovered celebrities (Squirrel!). If you've been living in a CNN-free world then please let this angry birds video enlighten you on the situation. Angry Birds illustrates the defining characteristic of the dictators (even they gave up on Mubarak). Unrest in the world this year has lead countless revolutions across the globe, causing dictators to flee from fear of wrinkling their suits. The first little piggy is no other than Ben Ali from Tunisia who is only the second president of the country but has kept that position since 1987. Out of all the dictators history has to offer, he is one of the most toned down and doesn't even sport a unique dictator hairstyle or facial hairstyle. Pulling this costume off would mean that you either need to be around a bunch of news junkies or wear a bright and obvious sash. T...

Pregnant ladies around the world can rejoice because this year there is a classy, easy, and enjoyable costume for all the baby mamas: Pregnant Beyonce. What better way to announce it than on NATIONAL TELEVISION. The full outfit. Everyone is more than excited for the pop diva and her husband to have their first child but no one is more excited than the pregnant women who are sick of being Kim Jong Il for Halloween again. See the resemblance? Or even a pregnant Britney Spears... Classy as always. While we're happy for the star studded couple we're really just happy that pregnant women everywhere have an excuse to dress up as a classy lady this Halloween and be a star themselves. How often does that happen really? Most importantly, remember that your costume end up affecting your children later when they see the pregnant pictures. Baby Kim Jong Il approves of the Beyonce costume. What you'll need: A baby bump from any trimester A hand...

Anonymous, an online civil activist group, has picked up the slack with our favorite borderline albino, Julian Assange (WikiLeaks), dancing away into oblivion. The world just can’t seem to catch a break. Financial troubles, natural disasters, and famine haven’t discriminated amongst the global population. This costume is perfect for anyone who’s discontent with the status quo, but has reservations about committing to a cause they know little about. No introduction needed. The best part of dressing as Anonymous is the ability to bring relevance to costumes/clothes from your earlier years. Hopped on the V for Vendetta bandwagon? Aspired to be Green Man from It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia? Looking for an occasion to wear an ill-fitting suit that was bought from you before puberty struck? Anonymous with a 4chan flair Don't be the voice of a silent generation but rather a loud voice in a faceless generation. S...

He may not be a very memorable Oscar host but James Franco has already created many memorable characters in his short career and what better year is there to pay an ode to this very odd actor than the year he gets nominated for a plethora (22 to be exact) of awards that have nothing to do with MTV. Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? James Franco's boobs. Within Franco's repertoire there's a man that represents a man within all of us. Whether it's the adventurous amputee man, the tattooed hillbilly man, or the pillow-loving man, there's something Franco has done in his career that will match that classy man inside you. My personal favorite  James as our adventurous future amputee! The beauty of James Franco costumes is that they could also be potential couples costumes for all the ladies that want in on the James Franco action. If you're tired of just having a pillow for a date, why not include a Tina Fey to your threesome? Maybe you need ...

If there ever is a time to make your old Hogwarts costume still relevant, it is now. With the last installment of Harry Potter hitting the theaters, wizards and witches are likely to take a backseat to vampires, hobgoblins, were-monkeys, or whatever kids will obsessively spend their parent's money on next.  Before you let your wizard costume collect dust in the back of your costume closet, give it a last hurrah at the height of its popularity. Harry giving his old costume a last hurrah Cedric (or otherwise known as sparkly vampire Edward) recycling his old wizard costume On that note, this year is not only the best time to recycle your old costume but also build a new one. I realize that, of all the years of this Harry Potter craze, I have never seen these guys on Halloween: Oh antagonists, you are so unpopular I know the Death Eaters are a crazy cult that praise a man that basically thinks he's going to be the first half human/half snake President o...